TED* Thoughts

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Yesterday Christians around the world celebrated the birth of an awesome Creator named Jesus of Nazareth.  For millennia other cultures and faiths have had traditions and some sort of recognition and celebration of the “return of the light” (at least here in the Northern Hemisphere).

In the cycle of the seasons, from fall through winter darkness has reached its zenith and now the light has begun its ascent toward spring and summer.

Creation – and creating – occurs in all seasons.  In fact, creating draws from both the darkness and the light.

This recognition came to mind this morning during our “quiet time” and after reading the morning paper, which contained an article on the movie writer-director, Cameron Crowe.  Writer Jake Coyle asked Crowe about the source of his positivity toward life – including the experiences of times of darkness.

His reply was that of a Creator clearly taking a Creator Orientation toward life:

“It’s innate and a goal… to battle back the daily hurdles or the challenges and just say, ‘How can I turn this into a positive?’ It’s interesting how sometimes positivity is the door that opens to a greater understanding of how to deal with the darkness.”

We all experience seasons of darkness – it is part of the human experience and the natural order of Creation.  However, rather than succumbing and adopting the role of Victim and reacting to them as Persecutors, we can choose to unlock “the door to a greater understanding of how to deal with the darkness,” by responding to such experiences as Challengers that call forth learning and growth and resourcefulness.

That is what it means to grow through the darkness and into the light.

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“TED* Thoughts” is published weekly (at least most of the time). It is intended to offer reflections and applications of The Power of TED* in order help facilitate a shift in worldview and relationship dynamics from the Karpman Drama Triangle (or what Ted calls the Dreaded Drama Triangle [DDT] ™) to TED* (* The Empowerment Dynamic) ™.  

Please help spread TED* through sharing this “TED* Thoughts” and by contributing your own thoughts by posting a comment.

To the Creator in you!

This past week I had the privilege and pleasure of facilitating a certification program for The Leadership Circle in the San Francisco area.  The cusomer service representative, who was very pleasant and attentive, always responded to my “thank you” with the reply “no problem.”  It reminded me of the following previous post.

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We are a problem-focused culture – and probably planet.  Just one look or listen of the news brings a litany of the daily blues and Challengers of the world.

One everyday example of our problem-centric mindset is the emergence over the past decade or so of the response of “No problem” that we often get when we thank someone.  (This may be an idiom particular to the particularly U.S.  – I really am not certain.)

The next time you are in a restaurant or the grocery or somewhere you are being “served,” notice what the response is when you say “thank you.”  There is a better-than-even chance that you will hear “no problem” at least as often “you’re welcome” (or some other affirming response).

Why do I have a problem with “no problem?”  Only that the language subtly reinforces the problem-focused Victim Orientation.  It keeps us psychological interacting around what we don’t want, which is a problem.

From a Creator Orientation, it seems to me that, in additional to the traditional “you’re welcome,” something that reinforces a positive outcome is in order (after all, we are thanking the other because of a positive outcome).  Responses like “glad you like it” or “happy to” or “it’s my pleasure” keeps the focus on what we want and like.

In the coming days, pay attention to how you respond when people say “thanks” to you and respond in the affirmative.  The subtle ways we use language can really influence the course of an interaction or conversation.

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“TED* Thoughts” is published weekly (at least most of the time). It is intended to offer reflections and applications of The Power of TED* in order help facilitate a shift in worldview and relationship dynamics from the Karpman Drama Triangle (or what Ted calls the Dreaded Drama Triangle [DDT] ™) to TED* (* The Empowerment Dynamic) ™.  

Please help spread TED* through sharing this “TED* Thoughts” and by contributing your own thoughts by posting a comment.

To the Creator in you!

Years ago I had the privilege of serving on the board of trustees of my church.  Like a lot of spiritual communities, each year we would adopt a theme to guide our worship and activities.  Recently I came across an old sweatshirt with one of those themes:

“Participants in Creation: Committed to Spirit and Service.”

Not bystanders.  Not spectators.  Participants.

Every thought, every word, every deed is an act of creating – and creation. 

Even reacting is creating.  If we are reacting to what we don’t like or don’t want, we are reinforcing the Victim Orientation.  In so doing, we are quite likely creating, perpetuating or engaging the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT)™ (aka the Karpman Drama Triangle).  Whether Victim, Persecutor or Rescuer, we are participants in creating more drama in the world.

By adopting a Creator Orientation and focusing on what we want to create and how we choose to respond to our life experiences, we are participants in conscious living – and encourage others to do the same through our thoughts, words and actions.  As a Creator, Challenger and Coach, we lift our relationships to a more resourceful reality by engaging and participating in TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic) ™.

As we go through our week, let’s pause every few hours and ask ourselves: what am I participating in creating?

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“TED* Thoughts” is published weekly (at least most of the time). It is intended to offer reflections and applications of The Power of TED* in order help facilitate a shift in worldview and relationship dynamics from the Karpman Drama Triangle (or what Ted calls the Dreaded Drama Triangle [DDT]™) to TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)™.  

Please help spread TED* through sharing this “TED* Thoughts” and by contributing your own thoughts by posting a comment.

To the Creator in you!

“The moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.  All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred.  A whole stream of events issues from the decision which no one could have dreamed would have come their way”

-          W.H. Murray

This often cited quote began the November 20^th reading in Mark Nepo’s The Book of Awakening, from which my wife and I read virtually every morning. Nepo went on to write:

“We’d all like a guarantee before making a decision or taking a risk, but the irony is that taking the risk is what opens up to our fate.  It’s like wanting to know what the things will taste like before putting them in your mouth.  It just can’t be figured out that way.”

As a Creator, we often do not know – especially at the beginning of the creating process – if what we want to create is even, in fact, possible.  I often cite the Wright Brothers (having grown up near Dayton, Ohio) as two individuals who had a passionately held vision of heavier-than-air human flight.  They held to this vision, even through failures and breakthroughs, as well as in the face of the best scientific and engineering minds of the day that were telling them that what they envisioned “defied the laws of physics.”

Next month (December 17^th) we celebrate the 108^th anniversary of their breakthrough first sustained flight.

They took great risks in pursuing this “hobby” of theirs and continued to draw on their passion which fueled the heart of their creating.  They were committed, but far from assured of success.

In fact, in an interview of Orville Wright, long after their success, a reporter asked what he and his brother were really after in their experimentation.  “Was it fame? Was it fortune?” he asked.

I’ve always loved Orville’s response: “Sir, if what my brother and I were after was either fame or fortune, we would have chosen a project with a much higher probability of success.”

Creating is not risk-free.  There may be setbacks and there may be seeming failures.  But, as Creators, we learn from them.  And we never know when the next Baby Step will, indeed, give us flight!

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“TED* Thoughts” is published weekly (at least most of the time). It is intended to offer reflections and applications of The Power of TED* in order help facilitate a shift in worldview and relationship dynamics from the Karpman Drama Triangle (or what Ted calls the Dreaded Drama Triangle [DDT] ™) to TED* (* The Empowerment Dynamic) ™.  

Please help spread TED* through sharing this “TED* Thoughts” and by contributing your own thoughts by posting a comment.

To the Creator in you!