In our TED* work we contend that the Victim (or Problem) Orientation is our default mindset as human beings. This way of moving through our life experience has us primary focused on the problems we face in our life – and in the world. These problems engage an inner state of anxiety or fear which …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/identify-your-reactive-triggers-and-strategies/
Negativity bias is a fancy term to explain the fact that we humans pay more attention to negative feelings or information than positive ones. In the TED* work we are often reminded that our human default way of being is to respond to problems, which will keep the drama alive if we are not aware …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/our-natural-negativity-bias-keeps-drama-alive/
Forgiving need not be outwardly focused. We may also need to give ourselves this precious gift. Let’s face it, there are times when we are our own worst Persecutors! I had the opportunity to experience this first-hand a while back. After 2 days of wonderful TED* workshops, I was at the airport working on my …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/the-gift-of-forgiveness/
By Andrea Scott, TED* Practitioner (learn more about Andrea at: Infinite Possibilities Coaching) We are trained from an early age to deny our feelings. You may have heard similar phrases when you were young, “Stop crying. It will make you sick” or “Big boys don’t cry.” As we get older, it is no surprise that …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/mr-bunny-to-the-rescue/
What do you do when you are triggered by a person or an event and you “go reactive?” The situation could be a difficult discussion with someone at work; an argument with a spouse, significant other or child; an unexpected traffic jam. Life is full of opportunities to be triggered into reactivity and, hence, the …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/going-to-the-balcony/
The role of the Persecutor in the Karpman Drama Triangle (Dreaded Drama Triangle™—DDT) puts others down by attempting to be “one up” in every conversation. Clinging to the need to be right is one of the fastest ways to persecute others. Because of the strong drive to succeed in our society, especially at work, we …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/your-need-to-be-right-will-persecute-others/
One of the fastest ways to feel like a Victim is to compare yourself to others. We may say to ourselves: “Why can’t I look that beautiful or be that smart or talented?” Another thought might be: “Down deep, I really don’t know what I am doing but it seems like other people do.” Or, …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/stop-comparing-yourself/
A friend recently said to us, “I am learning to have fewer reactive conversations and more frequent creative conversations.” What simple advice! The question arises, when we go reactive, how do we shift to a creative conversation and embody the TED* roles of Creator, Challenger and Coach? We recommend hitting the pause button to lengthen …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/hit-the-pause-button/
Last weekend we attended a local TEDx event. There were great live presenters, as well as a few presenters brought to us through video from other offerings of TED. (To clarify: TED here stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design and is not related to our Power of TED* work.) One of the taped talks was …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/constructive-conflict-the-challengers-contribution/
An experience of happiness often arises when we live in the empowered TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)™ roles of Creator, Challenger and Coach. Feeling joy can actually be distressing for some of us because there is a tendency to feel we don’t deserve this much happiness. Modern living has created an expectation that we must always …
Permanent link to this article: http://powerofted.com/when-feeling-happy-causes-distress/
