Recovering from the “need-to-please” pattern can be a long journey and is deeply rooted in the Rescuer role of the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT). When your “go-to” role in the DDT is being the Rescuer, you easily take on being helpful and pleasing to others as a self-identify. Your focus is on the needs of […]
Watching a young toddler play the “peek-a-boo” game is such joy. It’s the laughter and connecting that elicits the giggles each time the toddler yells; “Do it again!” Wouldn’t it be great if you could take a “do-over” moment when you have said something you didn’t mean, or you made a mistake you want to […]
I (Donna) recently had a challenging conversation that helped me realize, again, how important listening skills are. Here is the story: I called an audiologist to have my hearing tested. I have had ringing in my ears for a few years and wanted to have it checked out again. The receptionist eagerly found a time […]
There’s a fine line between being supportive and being overly helpful. Once you slip into over-helpful mode, you don’t have a choice to act. Your desire to be helpful becomes a craving, maybe even a compulsion. In this fast-paced world many of us “over-do” and become vigilant about what might go wrong. As soon as […]
Two weeks ago, we wrote about the Victim-to-Creator shift and last week the Persecutor-to-Challenger shift. This week we describe the Coach role, which is the positive alternative, or antidote, to the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) role of Rescuer. Together, the three TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)® roles represent the best of who you are as a human being. A […]
Of the three TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)® roles of Creator, Challenger, and Coach, we receive the most questions about the shift from the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) role of Persecutor to Challenger. We humans have a strong tendency to judge others and be critical of ourselves. While being a Persecutor to others may be what […]
When David first learned about the Karpman Drama Triangle and its roles of Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer many years ago, he knew he had lived much of his life from a Victim point of view. One day in quiet time he asked: “Okay God. I don’t want to live my life as a Victim anymore, […]
Yes, laughing matters, and is probably more important than ever given the challenges in the world. If you are paying attention to the news most events are not laughing matters! A deep belly laugh, though, is a valuable way to navigate through these troubling times. Laughing can help you lighten up when you may feel […]
“Cancel culture” is a term that has become popular in the last couple of years. With the recent ugly, reactive, traumatic, and drama-filled events in the US, we have noticed the phrase used more often. Wikipedia defines it this way: “Cancel culture (or call-out culture) is a modern form of ostracism in which someone is […]
When we hold multi-day workshops, at the end of the first day we ask participants to “stay tuned” to their experiences that night and simply notice how the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) and its roles of Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer may show up. The next morning, we invite participants to share what they noticed. The […]