Do you know that you can translate a message in Outlook with a few clicks of your computer mouse? We didn’t, until a couple days ago when we received a message that was written in Swedish. Try as we might – and with only a distant memory of German from 2 years of study in high school – there was just no way to make out what the message was saying. About all that was discernable was that it referred to some dates.
Then, quite by accident, a right click of the mouse showed an option to translate. Lo and behold there is a way to translate from many different languages into other languages. So we highlighted the message, set the options to translate from Swedish to English and – magic! – there in the right hand column appeared the message! While it was not a perfect translation, enough was there to make it clear that it was an “auto-respond”, “out of office” message. It was generated upon receipt of this month’s “TED* Letter” ezine (“Addicted to Drama – Part II”).
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could so simply “translate” the thoughts and intentions that drive the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT) easily into expressions of The Empowerment Dynamic (TED)? Perhaps if we listen deeply to someone who is reacting as a Victim, we can translate their complaint into an understanding of their deeper commitment and to what they care most about. Maybe, when one turns to us as a Rescuer and wants us to “fix” them, we could translate that desire for solutions by becoming a Coach and helping them find their own way – with our support. Perhaps a Persecutor could translate the intention behind their challenge by speaking to the learning they are hoping to spark – thus becoming a conscious constructive Challenger.
With practice – LOTS of practice – we can grow into translators for ourselves and others as we learn to speak more fluently the language of TED*.